Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Vodka?
Forever.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
