We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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