it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
