So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
