Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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