hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
