Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize