i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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