I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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