No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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