what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
