yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
