Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Randomize
