I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
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