"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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