Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
