Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
i think my mom watched the whole time
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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