You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize