absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
