just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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