If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
