I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
