Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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