He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
