Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize