There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
