Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize