he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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