my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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