I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
