You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
