I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i may or may not be watching the land before time
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
