how do flat chested girls get laid?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I think I just sharted jello shots
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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