Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Randomize
