the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
