Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
