after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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