We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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