I heard we made out
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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