physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
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