Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize