you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
