Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
