i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
