I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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