im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So many bounce houses so little time
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
