Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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