how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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