should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Randomize
