I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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