Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
