It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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