he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
