I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
She's the barista slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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